Tuesday, March 30, 2010

just wait until i'm sexy!

If you've read my blog before - and I doubt you have, since barely anyone does - you know that I have an open approach to relationships.

Still, I am not above using the South African hottie as a protective shield - or, if I'm being *completely* honest, an excuse - when someone I am not interested in makes a move in my direction.

True, considering my views on monogamy it's not very honest of me to respond that way, but damn, it sure is efficient.

And so, for the second time in about a week, I essentially lied as a way of telling a guy that I wasn't interested.

Here's a summary of the latest convo (via Facebook, the Craigslist for rural Nova Scotians):

Him: Do u like young guys lol

Me: Some of them. (Because when it comes down to it I can't tell a bald-faced lie.)

Him: [I'm] lookin for a lil fun lol

(What is it about 20-somethings and their distaste for punctuation and clarity?)

Me: My boyfriend is 40, so I guess that's young enough. (See what I did there? I used the South African hottie and hinted at my age in the hope it would pour cold water on his efforts. Damn, I'm good at this.)

Him: Oh, you have a boyfriend? (Actually, it was much less articulate than that.)

Pause.

Him: Would u want 2?

So much for the shield. Time for the weapons of mass destruction.

Me: No, thank you. (I actually wrote it that way. To emphasize how wrong I am for this guy.)

Me: I'm old enough to be your mom. Too creepy.

Me: And I never wanted to be a cougar. (I really didn't.)

Me: Haha (To ease his pain.)

So, when Couch to 5k finally gives me an ass, will I have to beat them off with a stick?

Speaking of C25k, tonight's workout went really well. The three-minute jogs were significantly easier to get through. I still can't imagine running five kilometers, mind you. I'm a little terrified at how the program is gonna get me there, but so far it's been doable.

I'll just have to have a little faith, I suppose. Here's to faith!


(Unless it's in the pants of a Facebook creep.)

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